Vaca for the kids

My kids are going on vacation with their Mom tomorrow. I have already cried three times and they haven't even left yet. I sit and wish that it was me taking them somewhere. But its just not in the cards right now. I have had a lot of emotions as this date approached. I love having them everyday and have had it that way for awhile now. They are my best friends. I love spending every minute I can with them. Its only for five or six days, but I am not going to have any idea what to do with myself.

I protect my kids. Maybe over protective...okay a lot. But I am trying to reduce that so they can experience life. Make em street tough! I want them to understand they can do anything they want. They need to take it if they want something bad enough. They both have already shown to me that they have that desire. Dream big! Go big! No matter what, I will always be there for them. I just worry what I am trying to teach them may get changed based on other people on their lives. So I am having such a hard time right now.

We have formed such an amazing bond. Hopefully a bond that will last for all of our lives. Knowing what we have done for each other, knowing that they have changed me as a man. Hopefully knowing that I have changed them for the better. They are caring beautiful children. I may not portray it, but I am one of the luckiest guys alive.

Whatchu got?? ....Nuttin man

I have not blogged for a while and to be honest, I really don't have anything to blog about. So I am just giving a good ole fashioned update.

For some reason, I decided to coach baseball again. I just can't bring myself to let someone else coach Jaxon for baseball when I clearly know everything there is to know. The hard part is going to be coaching Jaxon and Taylor is playing soccer. I hate that she is so good at it. Stupid soccer. But I support her no matter what. Jaxons swing has really improved over the winter. I have only had a couple of practices and a few parents have complimented me about him. He is six years old and taking on a leadership role. Keeping the other kids from goofing off and hustling. Extremely proud of that little guy. Taylor has turned into a flat out skater. She spends a lot of time outside to board. She keeps begging me to take her to the skate park, but I am nervous.

Work has been insane as usual. I took a nice break from it in December. I was completely fried out. The hard part with that is, I still am. I have been fighting to stay motivated. I have to for my kids, but honestly I wish I had a few months off to recharge.

Love life... No love yet. I tend to think that the women I am interested do not want to give it a shot because of my situation. Having the kids full time. Having kids at all. Not being the get out and party a lot type. Its not me. It makes it a lot harder. But I am content. I wine and post shit about being alone. I have my weak moments. I am alone and do wish I was with someone. But I know that this is my life now. I put myself in this position. I wouldn't change it for the world. I have my two perfect children full time. Taylor begs and begs for me to date. She wants another girl in the house. Maybe someday. Maybe one day, that special someone is gonna wake up and realize I am a good catch. Duh! Come on already! ;)

Jazz season just about done. My pops didn't renew his seats for next season, so I bought his seat. Should be interesting because all my friends this year dog me...Assfaces!

Overall, really excited for the spring and summer. My favorite time of year. Excited to camp and get our 4 wheelin on. Excited to just be outside and chill. I am like Craig from Friday. But without Smokey. "How you get fired on yo day off?"

Well thats all I got ladies and genitals. Nothing exciting to report. Nothing funny to talk about. Motivation is needed. Maybe when this weather changes. Until next time peeps.

Peeeaaaace!